Bullying has lost its way with Jesus

Another tragic loss of life has been felt today. This time in Stillwater as Cade Poulos, a jr. high student committed suicide at school! Why did this happen? Should have it happened? These are questions that will be asked. I am just as sad as the next person hearing of this event, but let's take a look at the bigger picture.

It is not new, but has come to light since the Columbine shooting in 1999. Bullying is nothing new, it's new to the fact that it has become the social movement of our time.

The victims of bullying are using the easy way out, violence. They are victims of useless violence, yet they extract violence in return. This is not the answer. The real issue isn't bullying as it has been around since the beginning of time. The real issue is Americans have lost their way with God! Oh how easy it is to forget or ignore the fact that Jesus died on the cross for our sins was an act of bullying. With that being said...

We have lost our way with Jesus and faith in general. When the good Lord is present in ones life there shall be no worries or evil that you cannot overcome. With his faith in our hearts we can be victorious!

Now I'm not the most religious person by any means, but I firmly believe in the Almighty!

The challenges that the youth today face have become more and more trying each day. Technology has cast a spell over the world. Morals have went out the window, family and faith are not what they use to be. You add all of these things plus other variables and you are bound to have something blowup in front of you. It is those moral values, lack of faith and lack of family interaction/parenting these days that has caused the real issue, not bullying. If parents took the time to sit down with their kids and teach them the way of the Lord, with family and moral values the world would be a much better place. Sadly, parents are to busy these days to actually know what really is going on in their child's life. Sit down meals at supper time are a thing of the past. This gave parents and kids that face-to-face time that is needed in ones life. It helps us express issues that we are faced with. Praying together before bed helps reassure any fears, because you are placing those fears in the hands of the good Lord. These simple practices can change a kids life. These are the true outlets they need, not murder or suicide.

Bullying is a fact of life. Whether we like it or not we are faced with it at some point. From your boss that belittles you every day, because they had a bad day at home, or the police using excessive force when it truly is not needed, or men beating their wives; it is all a type of bullying. It is never good that bullying happens, yet it does.

Anyone that was born before 1990 knows bullying has been around forever, we just dealt with it differently. If you got into trouble at school most likely you were spanked at school and again at home; if not worse repercussions happened! When you were bullied or disrespected at school you fought it out one-on-one on the playground or for you old timers the flagpole. That was a way of life, you squashed altercations right there and then. No stewing over it for days, months or years; keeping it all bottled up until the right moment was there to unleash the beast. We talked things out. Most of the time after a playground fight you actually became friends with your opponent. Not always.

Again this new way of committing murder, violence or suicide to get the attention of the public and/or bully is just nonsense. And the media has played right into the hands of those committing the acts of violence. They add fuel to the fire, because every time something happens of this nature, the next kid is watching the news coverage figuring out his/her plot. It's not rocket science. Kids prepare for these type of events sadly. How can there's be bigger & deadlier than the last.

Parents need to be held more accountable. They need to take the reigns and teach kids violence is not the way, there are better solutions. Yes, sadly today you can't just run out to the playground and either whip that "butt" or get whipped. Those days are long gone, now days everyone has a weapon and will use it.

Hopefully the family of Cade in Stillwater will find the strength in the good Lord to understand the events of today. No one should have to deal with bullying, but it is how we go about dealing with it that sets the tone for the future.

Everyone knows Psalms 23: 4-6, Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me, your rod and staff, they comfort me. This scripture signifies that fear we have in life, yet faith in the good Lord will not allow us to be fearful as we have comfort in you! Parents must reaffirm church and Christ as part of a child's education, without these kids will become those lost sheep.

When times get tough, true faith in Jesus Christ will guide you to the justice you seek. Bullying is unjustified, but by denying Christ in ones life is the ultimate injustice!!

Most educated individuals will have their own opinions, rants and point of views, whether they are good, bad or indifferent & I welcome them all. But I've seen and read enough about all this violence and how bad bullying is to take the time to rant myself. In end it is sad that another child was taken before their time, but it is not bullying that is the issue it is the lost ways of society and lack of faith and Jesus Christ that is the real issue!!

Three's Company…

They say everything happens in waves of three. Lately, maybe that is the case for my relationships and a bad case of karma. Let me get this off my chest, I am no saint nor am I perfect. I have many flaws and I will be the first to admit to my mistakes.

When it comes to relationships I feel that it is one subject area that I am still lacking the vital tools to make one last in the end. I feel comfortable that I have pretty good people skills in general, but when it comes to the fairer sex and dating, something is missing. I need to restock my toolbox with tools for 21^st century dating.

I am by far the easiest person to get along with; I am not mean by any means, just quite stubborn in my ways and views. That right there is one of my issues. Isn’t admitting you have a problem the first step in recovery? (Wait that’s a whole different ball of wax.) I am always quick to lecture a point about something, not so much into actually lecturing, but it just comes across that way. Mostly it seems to come from my own personal experiences and I am only trying to give advice, but some take it as I am being a parent and lecturing to them. None of us like to be lectured too. But from what I have gathered in my short life and from the lectures that I have received there is a point behind them; and usually for the best. At the time we may not want to hear it, but whoever is doing the talking probably knows a thing or two on the subject at hand. I believe I am no different as I have experienced many up’s and down’s in my short life. To me those have been learning experiences.

Prior to my most recent relationship bumble, the previous two before that ended around the third month via text message; nonetheless this last one was no different. Except we made it to four months! Oh technology, how you can be a cruel cruel tool these days. This is where karma has come full circle in my life. 

Almost two years ago, I was the one who did the breaking up via text. Hippocratic yes I am and guess what here I am blaming no one but myself. This time it seemed different for my end, was pretty much caught off guard, but at the same time don’t feel as down about it. Does that mean the care or love for that individual wasn’t there? No. Those feelings were true, but what cost us was two stubborn individuals that was not going to communicate in the end, because I am me and tired of being the good guy that seems to screw something up and own up to that screw up, yet didn’t do any good. Thought we were both grown adults and had better communication skills to work an issue out. Guess I said one thing, yet went against what I said and it was misconstrued. Again when you only communicate via text message, a message or two most likely will get misinterpreted. I know I’ve had to re-read a message a time or two and then the light bulb went off as to, oh that is what they meant. Silly me.

I recently read someone’s quote that dealt with “It is what it is”, they said it wasn’t, but “It is what we make of it.” I fully see that as the glass half full view on anything in life.

I didn’t think my dating or relationship skills were this bad, but from the looks of things, I obliviously have some sort of learning disability. I true to take every bad and turn it into good or very least a learning experience that I do not want to duplicate. I typically tell people I am a slow learner, sometimes I don’t think they really believe me, but in the end it’s the truth.

Communication is the best skill a person can have when it comes to relationships of any kind, without communication things will get misinterpreted and if you can’t communicate to fix those misinterpretations then things are doomed. Guess it’s time for me to go back to school and learn communication skills again.

I know in the end I didn’t help the situation, it seemed in the last month of the relationship we had more little arguments then we did the whole rest of the time we dated. A lot of those were brought on by me, because when I do communicate I want to resolve the issue, not just turn and walk away. And when that happened I only made things worse by making the person talk, but that is who I am, I hate to leave unfinished business at hand. Some of those arguments were quite silly looking back. One dealt with how the president and congress was in a fuss about Ralph Lauren and the Olympic clothing issue. All I wanted was her thoughts, didn’t know it would lead to the beginning of the end, but it did. A few weeks later here I am writing my thoughts out.

And this is where I hope to learn some of those new tools, by talking about my failures and listening to advice from others. Does that mean I should listen while someone is lecturing to me? No, it just means maybe they have had similar experience and can help better understand what went wrong. So please by all means this is open for criticism and lecturing, have at it!